Relationships succeed when each party gives their all, so if you want to be treated like royalty, start treating your partner the same way. It’s the golden rule, essentially. “Treat Others The Way You Wish To Be Treated.” If you stop treating your relationship in terms of what YOU want and what YOU’RE getting, and instead give everything to make your partner happy, chances are (if you’ve got a good one) they’ll do the exact same thing for you.
As you read through this list, it won’t seem like this will lead to you getting pampered. But once everything is said and done, you’ll feel like the luckiest person in the world. It’s all about giving and showing love. Once you start doing that, it will be returned to you 100-fold.
1. Express Gratitude
Everyone likes being thanked for something they did. At work or at home, you like to be told you’re doing a good job. Naturally, your partner wants to hear the same things. Whether it’s something small like bringing you a glass of water while they’re in the kitchen, or something big like taking the dog out so you can sleep in a little later, let them know you appreciate it. Once you start to do it, they’ll reciprocate. Ingraining simple habits like saying thank you is key to any relationship, especially if your living together. Think of it this way; if you cook, and never get a thank you, eventually you’ll stop feeling appreciated and stop cooking. On the other hand, if every little nice thing is met with gratitude of some kind (a hug, kiss, thank you, or even an offer to do something in exchange for your deed) you and your partner will be more likely to continue doing nice things for each other. And the more nice things you do for each other, the more genuinely appreciative you’ll be, and vice versa.
2. Give Compliments
This runs in the same vein as expressing gratitude. I’m not saying that your boyfriend or girlfriend’s self-image hinges on what you say or think about them, but giving out a compliment whenever you see your partner in something that makes them look good will make them feel more attractive. That attractiveness builds confidence, and I guarantee that the more confident your partner is, the more attractive they’ll be to you.
Let’s not lie, everyone wants to go out with a piece of arm candy. Whether you appreciate their brain, their looks, their kindness, or everything about them (which I sincerely hope you do), make it known.
3. Apologize & Forgive
No one likes getting in fights, and I don’t know a single person who likes to admit they’re wrong (I’m particularly stubborn about admitting I’m wrong, and tend to go to town on an argument like a dog with a bone) HOWEVER, everyone knows that being the bigger person and admitting that mistakes might have been made will go a long way in resolving whatever the issue is. I’m quit possibly the worst about apologizing after fights, but I can usually at least admit when I was being mean. And acknowledging that you hurt someone’s feelings, and that you feel bad about it, will help to diffuse a lot of anger. I’m not saying to apologize just to apologize; it should definitely be sincere.
On that note, when your partner offers a sincere apology, accept it. You may need to wait to hear it until you’ve cooled down or gotten over the situation on your own, but holding your hurt and pain over your S.O.’s head is incredibly damaging to the relationship. And once you’ve accepted their apology, you need to force yourself to end the issue. It’s been apologized for, and hopefully a resolution has been achieved. That means you should avoid bringing it up in future arguments. No one likes the person who can’t let go.
4. Do the Chores Your S.O. Hates
So, I don’t know about you, but I really hate doing dishes, especially after I’ve spent an hour or more cooking. Likewise, my boyfriend hates laundry. So generally, I do it for him, as long as he helps me out with the dishes whenever I cook. It’s a tradeoff, like many other chores that have to be done. Share them, and you’ll get along so much better.
5. Make It A Partnership
You wouldn’t start a business by yourself. You’d want investors, and hopefully, a partner, that helps even you out and gives you something to lean on in areas that you’re weak. That’s what a relationship should be; a partnership. If you can’t lean on each other, then that means you’re all alone, even within your relationship. And that’s an incredibly depressing thought.
6. Don’t Feel Guilty For Asking What You Want
This is the secret to success. If you’re doing the best you can for your partner, then you don’t have to feel guilty asking him or her to pick up some slack. At the very least, a discussion can be opened to figure out a way that everyone gets what they want, which will ultimately end in you feeling as though you’re being treated like royalty. Which is what we all want out of a relationship, right?
Notice that there’s nothing about money here. Nothing about buying gifts, going on extravagant dates, or even how attractive you should strive to be. The fact is, being in a relationship isn’t about being pampered, or being sexy. It’s about finding a great person and letting them inspire you to be better for them, while simultaneously trying your hardest to be the inspiration for them.