Posted On January 30, 2014 By In Lifestyle, Manzone

The Birds and the Bees: Weird Facts About Sex

 
 

Has it been too long since you learned some facts? Would you like to think about sex under the guise of learning? Well, fear not, #writtalifers, because I am here to take care of you.

  1. Sperm has a sense of smell.

    Put it down, bro, or even your sperm will hate you.

     

  2. The largest natural breasts in the world, according to the Guinness Book of World Records, measure (drumroll, please…) 70 INCHES, OR, 5.83 FEET. I wish I could capitalize numbers for emphasis, because my back hurts just thinking about that.
    There DEFINITELY can be too much of a good thing.

    There DEFINITELY can be too much of a good thing.

  3. Some women can orgasm from their nipples. Some can through exercise (apparently, I’m exercising all wrong…) and some can just by thinking about it, like this lady (gaga).

    Hmmm.

     

  4. No wonder the French call orgasms La Petit Mort, or “Little Death”: the University of Groningen in the Netherlands found that during female orgasm, part of the brain actually shuts down. For the record it’s the amygdala, which controls memory, emotion regulation, and the combination of the two.
    massive_orgasm
  5. Platypus sex is seriously XXXXXXXXXX. That’s how many sex chromosomes a female platypus has, while female humans only have one pair, XX. Male platypuses–platypi? Whatever…have XYXYXYXYXY.
    Not appropriate for children.

    Not appropriate for children.

  6. Sooooooooo. Ancient Egyptians used crocodile shit as a contraceptive. A diaphragm, to be specific. And that’s all I’m going to say about that because I have to go throw up forever.
    Egyptian women had better excuses: you couldn't buy THOSE contraceptives at 7-11.
  7. Turns out people are definitely not the first to invent prostitution: a study done by a university in Singapore found that male macaques will groom females in order to “pay” for sex. So doin’ it like they do on the Discovery Channel is just good old-fashioned business, apparently.
    "Now that I'm grooming  you...I'm gonna give you Macaque"

    “Now that I’m grooming you…I’m gonna give you Macaque”

  8. I’ll count this as a personal victory since I hate wearing heels with the fiery passion of a thousand suns. According to research by Dr. Eden Fromberg, OBGYN, and the author of the awesomely named Vagina, A New Biography, wearing heels can make a lady’s orgasm weaker. Many heels are designed to arch the back, which causes the muscles in the pelvic floor to contract. Since they’re already flexed, they can’t go any further during those shiny, happy moments. Or as I like to call them, Life Enhancing Reasons to Wear Comfy Shoes.

    In the background, we see the majestic Burning Pile of Painful Shoes.

     

  9. Being better hydrated helps you orgasm more easily and better.
    Like any sport, sex requires ample hydration for optimum performance.

    Like any sport, sex requires ample hydration for optimum performance.

  10. Like you needed another way to procrastinate studying for finals or preparing for that meeting. According to a study done by psychologists in the UK, gettin’ it on right before a stressful event makes your blood pressure go way down and get back to normal levels much more quickly after. For some reason this effect only pops up with penetrative sex, not with oral, but hey…

Technically, the survival of our species depends on it, so get out there, drink some Gatorade and de-stress, champ!

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