Posted On April 16, 2014 By In Dating For Women, Girlzone

The Pickup Lines Every Girl Gets on OKCupid (But Doesn’t Necessarily Want To)

 
 

Don’t judge me for being on OKCupid because I know you’re probably thinking of how to describe yourself in three words at this very exact moment. I mean, I guess much like the “10 Internet Articles” article, if you begin to notice patterns in the online pickup lines you’re getting, maybe it’s time to go on a real date. Or maybe it’s just time to compile those pickup lines into a list that you then proceed to post on the internet. I don’t know. Do you, bbys.

1. The Holiday Themed Pickup Line

holiday pickup line

 

Obviously this one came around Christmas but I cannot WAIT to see what kind of shadily Anti-semitic shit I’m going to see now that Passover is here.

2. The Really Sexually Explicit and Actually Pretty Gross Pickup Line

getting head

 

Kiiiind of clever, but mostly just vomit-inducing. Bye.

Or this:

penis pic

 

I guess when a real dick pic doesn’t suffice, you do what you gotta do.

3. The Really Corny Pickup Line You’ve Heard 3563 Times and Even Seen on a T-Shirt Somewhere

jamaica

Protip: Anyone can Google “pickup lines to use on a girl.” Do better!

4. The “I Can’t Tell if I was Just Complimented or Insulted” Line

too good looking to be on here

So…which was it?? A compliment or an insult?

5. “…Huh?”

mmm cheese

Still so unsure what this dude’s endgame was.

This qualifies too:

penguin sledding

 

I think penguin sledding is some sex move I haven’t tried yet? Can anyone confirm?

6. The “I Can’t Believe People Actually Fall for This Shit”

maximum standards

I don’t even eat Cheetos.

7. The Message From a Member of the Same Sex that Makes You Consider Switching Teams

girl

8. …Until You Realize What She’s Really After

girl2

 

9. More Shit That Just Makes you go “…What?”

gay straight best friend

….Bruh
9. Somebody Confusing OKCupid with an Escort Service…

oral prostitution

10. …And the Craigslist “Film Gigs” Section

personal adult project

 

Sorry guys, I will most decidedly NOT be coming to a DVD store near you.

11. The One That Keeps You Coming Back

cory

 

Because at the end of the day, there’s a reason you haven’t deleted your account, thrown your computer out a window, and agreed to let your mom set you up on dates yet. ^^This, gentlemen, is how it’s done.

 

 

 

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Sara F Carter is a writer for Writtalin. Sara graduated from Emory University with a BA in Creative Writing and a BS in Theme Parties. She loves Batman, whiskey, crime dramas, and series of unrelated nouns. She wants to grow up to be a rapper’s wife. Her last name is not actually Carter, but one day it will be.

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